The Sexuality Lure, Stabilizing Hormones and the Mind

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader composed in with a dating issue and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and men use love to get sex." This is a terrific summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is comparable to the Love Trap, where singles analyze excellent sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further since for these songs, having sex brings tremendous significance and effects.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 methods:

A.they think sex is a essential test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready as well).

B.more commonly, all consciousness goes out the window, and one or both previously level-headed songs consider themselves a committed couple as soon as they have sex.
So, instead of taking a look at whether this other individual may be a match on levels aside from physical destination-- such as long-lasting requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with truth when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body responds to someone we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural i thought about this amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone (increases sexual desire), which makes the opportunity to make love with somebody we are drawn in to incredibly tough to resist. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce emotions), makings us feel really near and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical responses are strong and uncontrolled , causing powerful feelings of attraction, excitement, nearness, well-being, and love .

When issues occur, those who fall into the Sex Trap often justify by thinking, "Well, we've got problems, however the sex is terrific!" They probably wouldn't admit it, however they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their main scouting tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with see gay males, states that much of his clients have fallen under the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys especially in urbane locations, sex is readily available, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be great?".

However, North adds, "I believe this is a ' person' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to mention that chemistry is very important. Yet, chemistry is a considered that we cannot control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry happen, though sometimes it can grow in time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and reality hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure.

To linked here prevent the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This implies integrating chemistry with sound judgment. While great sex is very important for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner options by paying complete attention to your vision, goals, worths, and requirements -- while feeling all those interesting stimulates!

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