The Intimacy Temptation, Balancing Hormones and the Mind

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating problem and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and males utilize love to get sex." This is a terrific summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles interpret great sex as love. However those who fall under the Sex Trap go even farther because for these songs, having sex carries tremendous meaning and repercussions.

Singles fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two methods:

A.they believe sex is a essential test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will be excellent too).

B.more commonly, all awareness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a dedicated couple as soon as they have sex.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical tourist attraction-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with truth when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body reacts to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), makings the opportunity to make love with somebody we are drawn news in to extremely difficult to resist. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce emotions), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical reactions are involuntary and strong , resulting in powerful feelings of attraction, enjoyment, nearness, wellness, and love .

When problems develop, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently justify by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, but the sex is great!" They more than likely would not admit it, but they prioritize physical intimacy and regard the rest as optional. Their main searching tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mostly with gay guys, says that a number of his customers have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men specifically in urbane areas, sex is easily available, and that in itself is a trap," North states. Why waste your time if the sex isn't imp sourcethis hyperlink going to be excellent?".

Nonetheless, North adds, "I suspect this is a 'guy' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do desire to explain that chemistry is very important. Yet, chemistry is a considered that we can't control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry take place, though in some cases it can grow over time.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication uses off and truth hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you must balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This suggests integrating chemistry with good sense. While great sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you require to make your partner choices by paying complete focus on your vision, objectives, worths, and requirements -- while feeling all those interesting sparks!

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